That Chewing Sensation…

Life occasionally offers us delicious examples of comeuppances to our enemies. Recent events have provided two in quick succession:

I hope you weren’t eating. But we need a reminder. This is Dianne Feinstein, U. S. senator from the State of California. Those of us who care about rights are well versed in her dedication to tyranny, but just in case some of my readers have missed the memo, here’s what she told 60 Minutes:

More recently, she’s taken time off from pushing gun control to criticize the actions of Edward Snowden, accusing him of treason. She has no problem with the NSA spying on American citizens.

But in the last few days, she’s swung around so fast that I’m surprised her hair isn’t on backward. It seems that the CIA had the nerve to spy on the Senate. And that’s too much for her highness. Has she become a born-again good citizen, ready to protect our rights? I doubt it. But it is pleasant to see her cooked in her own sauces.

This story recalls the tale of the frog and the scorpion. The scorpion asks the frog for a ride across a river, and though the frog is suspicious, he allows the scorpion on his back. The scorpion stings the frog in midstream, explaining that such an act is in its nature. The characteristic of spy agencies is that they spy. It’s the job of legislators to provide oversight, not carte blanche, but when someone like Feinstein falls down in her duty, she has only herself to blame when she is on the receiving end of violations.

She’s not alone, though, in experiencing a comeuppance. Blowhard British loudmouth, Piers Morgan–this fellow:

is set to have his show, Piers Morgan Live, cancelled by CNN. Morgan developed a reputation for telling Americans how we should run our country and for shouting over his guests who didn’t meekly agree with his every comment. And lo! his ratings plummeted.

Now he’s welcome to express himself however he chooses, but at the same time, we’re not under any obligation to listen to him.

These two deserve each other:

With any luck, they can buy an island and inhabit it together, monitoring each other’s activities and explaining to each other how they are superior to the rest of us.

Barring that, we can enjoy seeing them wake up to the chomping sensation in their bums. Feinstein and Morgan, what you’re feeling is called life biting you in the arse. Since sitting will be difficult for you, how about joining us in standing up for our rights?

An Open Letter to the Steubenville Rapists

You cried when you found out that you were found guilty of rape and would spend some time (all too little) in detention. Please cry enough for a river, build a bridge, and get over it–straight into a tiny cell.

Perhaps you thought that being football players gave you permission to do whatever you wanted. Perhaps you’re simply stupid. Perhaps you’re evil. Here’s a message: I don’t care. American culture has a problem in choosing its heroes, and that may increase the temptation, but that’s just too bad.

What you did was wrong. The punishment that you will receive is not nearly enough, but you were right in one respect. Your lives have been labelled forever. Whatever good comes into your lives from here on out will have to be earned. We discussed a river above.

But here’s what you missed: You did this to yourselves.

Here’s another thing that you missed: The girl you raped has also had her life changed. Your complete lack of regret about this would be telling, but we already know what you’re worth–if you’re in doubt, go to a cow pasture once you’re back in circulation and find a pile of shit. The difference between you and the pile? The pile returns something of value to the world.

Why am I bothering to write about this? Because CNN whined about what is happening to you. I don’t want there to be any doubt regarding my position on the subject. One news organization may feel sorry for you. I do not.

I hope that I’m not alone.